Learning to treasure relationship

Everysince my brother and sis gotten married
I've become more and more unhappy as i feel so lonely.. especially with my mum going for mahjong daily..
as a result, i tried to find love online.. and ended gotten my heart broken twice..
i didnt' know it will be so tough, but good lesson learnt from here, and i know, if time can be rewinded, i will want to start the relationship with them again.. especially with Yazid

i met oliver on 29 aug, and started a relationship with him unknowing that he's a married man and is out to cheat me only.. and i guess, what he only wants is sex with me, and he got it of cos.. but cos of cycling, and my infinite patience, he couldn't get rid of me, and we sorta went all the way till feb, when he finally decided not to continue and started ignoring me.. in oct, nov, dec and jan inititated to end the relationship, but he refused. But from feb, since CNY, he stopped talking to me except for a good morning daily.. which i find it meaningless.. and finally in Apr, we ended..
He is my ideal guy.. very smart, confidence, i love his body size, and amazingly, his uncle looks. I love how loud and full of life he is, and how nice he hugged me previously. I feel proud standing besides him, knowing that i meant something to him.. unfortunately, we have nothing to talk about as he refused to tell me his personal life and how can we continue a relationship when our conversation only revolves around cycling?

in late april when i parted way with oliver and was badly hurt, yazid came along..
was so happy to find someone that share the same birthday as me. Due to louis, i felt guys born on 15 Jun are great people. i was attracted with how confident, comfortable he look when he fetched me at my place. how he placed his head on his palm while he drives, and how he doesn't want to give me his real name as he is a malay cos he doesn't looks like one at all
i always wonder, at which point of our first date did he decided that he wanted to bring me home and have sex with me.. what did i do to let him think that i was willing to do so? why did i accept his invite to his place at 1plus am in the middle of the night? why did i trust him that much? and why did i agree to it finally?
i also wonder, at which point did he had feelings for me that he constantly has me in his thots, and ask for my company every other night?
and thruout this short 1.5 mths.. was he just going thru a rough patch with his gf? or did he still have a gf then? The fact that he was evasive with his personal number and details, and that there's that pink phone on his tv console always made me wonder.. and that time at bugis, he took a photo of such a cute quote, who did he want to send it too? all these facts made me insecure being with him, and that was why i held back.. and the fact that he didn't want to spend our birthday together?  doesn't all these points to the fact that he wasn't being serious with me?
but i learn a very good lesson too. i sincercely believe at one point of time, he was genuinely attracted to me and want to be with me.. but i failed to treasure it, and put myself on a pedestral, thinking that if he likes me, he will come and look for me.. and as a results.. he felt sian and just simply ignored me.. or maybe, after i gave him the sound dock, he realised that i really fell for him, and thus he wanted out since he never wanted to be serious with me? I dunno.. i dun think i will get these questions answered..

but it's true, the more i date, the clearer i know what i want.. so will have to have faith, and just carry on with my life, to remind myself to treasure relationship, which is somehing that i obviously don't cos i am always too nonchalent and have this super inferior complex thinking that i shouldn't be bothering people.. so moving forward, if i like someone, i'll just tell them so. and if anyone is nice to me, i'll learn how to treasure them. I will learn how to love myself more, and to be more selfish, not to think too much for others, cos they also dun bother thinking for me too.

I pray for God to give me strength.

Summing up 2014

2014 is a rather significant year for me.. Finally did the surgery i've been fantasizing for half my life, and thankfully, have decided to go ahead with it.
Finally did my breast reduction surgery, and is so much happier now. No more excess weight on my shoulder, causing me the unbearable headache. First time being able to buy a bra that I like as well!
Went for a E cup to a C Cup.. am so grateful for it.
And with this surgery, I made tons of excuses for myself to rest, and ended up not working again..
It's 31st Oct 2014 today.. was looking at my payslip earlier.. given that I've been drawing abt 6k monthly without doing anything much, I feel really contented. So lousy of me to have such low expectations with myself..

Am going for a short korea trip soon, and I wonder if what will happen when I come back.. will i find enoff motivation to work again?

And also, my bro is getting married next year.. We've really reached the stage when we are moving on.. moving on to build our own family, where I'll soon be displace as a family to become an extended family. I've been reminding myself, it's my last year having my brother as a little kid brother, someone whom i love so dearly. And sadly, my place in his heart is reducing. similarly, it saddens me to see my sis doing so much for her boyfriend, which i will never see her do for us. Am I really too nice, why do i always see myself as the only person who loves and contribute to the family. And as I always remind myself, it's because I feel guilty, guilty about not calling out to daddy, and thus cause his death, that makes me feel that I need to continue giving.

Hopefully, comes next year, I'll live more for myself and find my other half.

Settled the breast this year. Am going to look frward to losing weight and to look better next year.
Hair and skin ae both tamed now. It's the figure that I gotta attack come next year.

Career is stabalised, especially if i'm able to absorb all of irene's client.
gotta share that cub with kelyn and start calling all the clients. going to input into my calender on appointments
since mum is playing mj daily, there's really no need for me to sty at home to company her. and she'll feel easier playing as well. But i really dun like her to stay so late at nite daily.

It's my business that I am most concern about. It's lousy. lousy sales, lousy marketing, dunno how to carry on, and I must carry on. I firmly believe in creating something for myself. So i will not give up, and have to figure out a way on how to continue on with this.

Still debating if I should get a flat or condo.
feeling pitifully broke.. just dunno where all my earnings gone to despite my relatively high salary.. feels sad to think about it..

It is both a happy and sad day today.
Again, for dunno what reason, love kwangsoo so much!
Haha, went to his first fan,ever today... But sadly, failed to do the high five and hug him. I am so sad. But at least, I have seen him. N I am so so so so happie.
He is really someone I just wanna bring home like a pet. So adorable, sweet, humble and cute.
Thank for for giving me a reason to luff daily.
N really hope that he will like the pressie I gave him too.
It is time to focus back on my life. I am glad that I have reached the desired savings I want. Am thinking of doing up myself physically again.
Went to see the dr for the the breast, unfortunately, can't get it reduced.
But as yl said, I have nvr lose weight before. Can I try and slim down, and logically, I will become smaller. So can I do it pls, for myself.
It is aug.. Can I pls reach 55 then?
Can I just reduce my food intake and increase my intake of good food. Can I just eat much lesser, and only eat half of whatever is given to me? Can I just take healthy things?
Doing a med exam for myself- where I am now.
Cont with my yoga- moving towards where I wanna be
Eating lesser and healthier. Saying no to unhealthy food.. Veggie n veggie.
I really wanna become slimmer. Really.. So that I will become more confident. I am alr 31 moving to 32. I feel so scared.. Cos with the idols that I like becoming younger than me, I realized I do not have much yrs left. I wanna grab hold of the remaining yrs of whatsoever little youth I have. And the best way is to take care of myself. ESP now that I have money, but there is no youth and energy. Looking at kjk, being healthy n taking care of oneself is so good.
Can I eat wholemeal daily, and just fruits veggie and fish? Just fruits for dinner?

Cut down on processed food?
I really want to become 48kg when I visit Seoul next year.
Eat at regular hours?

Putting on a mask on the days that I m dng yoga?
I will stop putting heavy makeup and opt for simple one. I dun like the look of myself with heavy makeup. I look so old n intimidating.

After yoga tmr, I shall buy a wholemeal bread and have that for breakfast. With plain water.
Lunch is fish soup
Dinner is fruits
Can I cont on with this for one whole week, and see the effects? Can I stop thinking to myself that I will not have energy?
Can I just preserve on pls?
For kwangsoo, so that I will look completely different next year, n can start buying new clothes. Become like mic.. A totally different person.
Cut off the belly fat. The leg and the arms.
What I feed will grow. Remember this.

Good morning, afternoon, evening or night to you.

This article is for us all. The intention is to bring and offer ways to self-understanding and ultimate acceptance. Not an easy task, but nonetheless possible for us all.

When times are tough we feel hardships and difficulties around us. It feels as if life is unfair and that we are being punished. We want the misery to end, to be given a break and for things to change and turn for the better.

If only we could have done things differently, are the words which echo in our minds. We even end up blaming ourselves and start to think that we deserve the negative situation we are in.

In the midst of the situation we are in it becomes difficult to focus on a different light or better perspective and yet at that moment in time it is the only thing we must do. Only then can we change it. We must relinquish control through the understanding that life does not punish us, but that life presents to us what we deeply feel about ourselves. This happens mostly on an unconscious level however we can influence it consciously and in our favor too.

We must thus look at our situation with new eyes. We must atone (realise and understand) but only when we feel that we have consciously or unconsciously done wrong - (please note, that we are talking about ourselves and not what others think we have done wrong- this is atonement) and take responsibility if we are to create the change we desire.

We must look at ourselves and our faults and realise that whatever mistake we feel we have made, that we too can change it. As hunans we are allowed to make mistakes. It is our imperfections that make us human. Seeking perfection in ourselves is therefore futile.

Remember that every day is a new day to start again and to make the best use of every new day choose to take responsibility by adjusting our thoughts about our feelings of guilt and regret to feelings of love.

Blame, regret or guilt do not serve us on anyway, nor others. They just hold us back. With these feelings tangled within us, we cannot move forward.

We do not repress those negative feelings. Instead we allow them to come up, we feel them and do not resist them so that the energy is transmuted to positive ones and then we make a change because we have left the darkness and entered the light.

In the moment we understand that we have the choice to change things for the better and then take action to do it, we open doors to opportunities previously unseen.

We are no longer victims, instead we become deciscion makers and creators. We are motivated to overcome, not through fear but through choice and in the knowing that because we ourselves are in control of our lives, we are therefore in control of what is to become. In the words of Ghandi, we become the change we seek.

All life improvement stems from taking responsibility and not handing out blame and the power to do this lives within us all of the time. Its just that we are sometimes blinded.

Therefore: We choose to live by choice not by chance. To be motivated and not manipulated. To be useful and not used. We choose to make changes, not excuses, to excel and not compete. When we choose self-esteem instead of self-pity we are in contact with our inner voice and dispel the random opinion of others.

We then begin to live our best lives.

40 Tips for Happy Health Life - MUST READ & SHARE

Health:
1. Drink plenty of water.
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants, and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
4. Live with the 3 E’s — Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
5. Make time for prayer and reflection
6. Play more games.
7. Read more books than you did in 2012.
8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
9. Sleep for 7 hours.


Personality:
10. Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day —- and while you walk, smile.
11. Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
12. Don’t have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13. Don’t over do; keep your limits.
14. Don’t take yourself so seriously; no one else does.
15. Don’t waste your precious energy on gossip.
16. Dream more while you are awake.
17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
18. Forget issues of the past. Don’t remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don’t hate others.
20. Make peace with your past so it won’t spoil the present.
21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
22. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
23. Smile and laugh more.
24. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.


Community:
25. Call your family often.
26. Each day give something good to others.
27. Forgive everyone for everything.
28. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
29. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
30. What other people think of you is none of your business.
31. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your family and friends will. Stay in touch.


Life:
32. Do the right things.
33. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
34. Forgiveness heals everything.
35. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
36. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
37. The best is yet to come.
38. When you awake alive in the morning, don’t take it for granted – embrace life.
39. Your inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

Last but not least:
40. Enjoy LIFE!

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A summary for the first half of 2013.. and of cos.. what to do moving forward?

It has been a long time since i pen my thots down..
of cos, the main excuse i wana use is that there is no proper pc for me to use, with the house pc keyboard spoilt and my functioning laptop in the office, and with the stifling environment there, how can i pen my thots down in the manner i wan?
but then again, i've been really lagging or the past half year, tons of thots in my head, and been ignoring them.. just doing the things that i oughta do, and continue to move forward, cos time wouldn't go backwards.

since the beginning of this year, had planned 2 trips, one to taiwan with my mum, and the other to HK with cl and alan.

Taiwan with my mum was meant to let her be happie, and enjoy herself, and i think basically that was achieve. it was a very very good trip, and i think my mum was definately happie. and the best best best part was, TV happen to be at taiwan then too, and i got such a wonderful chance to spend a day out with him, in such a comfortable setting too. Thank God for your arrangement.

HK with Cl was quite random, since last year, i always have this thot of going to HK alone, but cl told me to join them instead, so off i went with them. hmm.. how do i put it? it's just another trip, but i gotta a day off to walk around HK by myself, and i love the solitude and the fact that at that point of time, no one knows where i really am, and there is no need for me to be responsible or accountable towards anyone, and i totally absolutely love that freedom. i definetly hope that i can really get a chance to spend Xmas alone at HK at one point of my life. will i feel lonely then? i wonder..

next in march, it's my mum operation, and i became a maid for abt one month, and it is true, the busier one is, the more productive you'll be forced to become. had a good pdtion run then, and yet there is time to stay at home and look after my mum. thankfully, the operation is a good suceess, and my mum is no longer feeling pain anymore. thank you God.

subsequently, in april.. oh my god.. fell insanely mad over running man, and dedicated a good part of my day to serial watching all the eps.. even until today. good thing is that i am rather tired of it already, and has greatly cut down my hours spent on these eps. but it was a good stress reliver, and really really made me happie.

what happened in May? it's like so blur.. and sis bought an apartment that we can eventually move into in about 3 years time... my mum was so so so so happie then.. haha.. so i guess, it is likely spent on running man as well.. and in June, just last mth, and my bd month, running man, eating, going out, working, nothing significant happened. the promise to pen my thots on 15 jun didn't materialise.. and went for Mayday concert instead, which ended up rather disappointing thou.. hiaz... will i still visit them next time? I wonder.. and of yah, first time spending 300 on a fan meeting on a obsence relatively unknown animal call kwangsoo.. the v cute giraffe that brought me tons of laughter for the past few months.. amazing, but i guess, i'm trying to grab hold of my last bits of youth and idol chasing bah...

meanwhile, during the past few mths, i picked back bikram yoga, which i am absolutely enjoying, and still have about a year of mendership leaft, that i will continue to go for.. don't understand why my weight isn't dropping thou.. and for some unknown reason, my skin cleared out alot in the past 1-2 months.. so thankful for it, cos i can feel its whiteness and has become much more softer know. makeup skills improved, and in generally, the physical well being has improve. also, finance side is rather stable, and improving, and m working towards my goal of giving myself stability in terms of my financial being.

moving forward, there is only about 4-5 months left in this year..
what lies ahead?

physically
- breast reduction.
have went to see a polyclinic dr to get referral for othpeadic, and decided to go under private instead, so am going to see the specialist this week, and to determine that it is those humongus pair of melons that are causing my shoulder aches. and it is gradually causing me to have breathing and neck problems too.. somehow i suspect that it is because my fats around my back and ;shoulder are reducing due to the bikram yoga which ended up worsening this problem. n i swear, they are still growing bigger and bigger..
the breast will be reduced to a cup c by the end of this year, no matter how much it cost me.

- face/ skin
continue my routine of putting mask, at least prob 4-5 times per week
and i'm going to finish those sample product packs along the way.. helps to save $ from buying my usual products, and giving my skin a change in routine as well.
and i will continue to see julie, prob, once every 2-3 months to keep the skin healthy and feed it with more vitamins.
all in all, i am greatful for the change in my skin, and pls, let me continue with this routine..
i'll also continue to double cleanse the face, think they work great, and the skin in much less oily and dirty already.
will continue to put on make up and let myself feels good.

- hair
nothing much, pretty comfy with it and guess will continue to grow it till the end of the year..

- fat fat fat
gonna continue with my bikram yoga, let's keep it a min of 3 times per week ya..
no matter what the weighing machine says, i still believe that i have loss fats, and i just wana focus on my arms, my stomach and thunder thighs..
can i start doing crunches, just 50 per day? am i able to keep to that?

financially
- i know i need to grow my MT funds.. continue to be thrifty and to grow it.. i need the funds to buy myself a house when i reach 35.. will review it then..

attended a convocation and listened to a great speech ytd..
1- dividing my time into blks of hours instead of viewing it as a one lump call day.. do i want a blk of 8 hrs, 2 blks of 4 hrs or 8 blks of 1 hr? it changed my prespective and viewing at how to do things within deadline instead of just dragging my feet to let time pass, and to learn to make decision in a faster and more focused manner.

2- focusing on the car ahead of my car.. this has always been a matra that i live by..
i always believe in doing things that makes a difference 10 years later, and not now..
so moving forward
much as i m scare to start it, or failing and the time and efforts involve and am worrying that it will all be a major waste of time.. i really really wanna own something.. a business.. something that can pull my friends along the way.. something that i own, and have control over it.. i m really scared, but i wana try it.. but i am scare of losing the funds..

i wana do that blogshop thingy.. have been thinking thinking and thinking about it.. did some small micro mini negligible research on it.. but the way i see it, if the bigger brands can survive and is able to support renal and staff, what is a small co like ours, if we can produce similar products, be unable to make it if the cost is so much lower?
have the micro reseach and thinking, i guess, it is better to secure manufacturers instead first.
with that, i will have an idea of the cost, and how to work around the margin.

what i do know is that i wana produce clothes for the working ladies, cos working ladies like to dress up, and they like things that looks nice and unique.
i truely believe that mkting plans etc can be drawn up after that..


going to spend 2 hrs per day onto this blogshop thingy when applicable.
gonna find manufacturer
rental cost for shopfront/ warehouse
blogshop design
mkting plans
budgeting

going to spend 2 hrs per day on work as well
follow up calls
underwriting and admin
my current income is able to provide me with a decent lifestyle till the end of the year.. so i am gonna buck up and build up this blogshop biz..

picking up my dancing shoes...

finally.. a dream that i've been yearning for years is coming true..
gonna pick up my dancing shoes!
Zumba.. never know that there's such a dance like this.. and the best thing is, that's the thing i've always been looking for.. to dance, to dance with the beat, with the tempo, to dance without worries, to dance as thou i'm on a stage.. that's what i've really love.. and i've found it!
Happie!

So now.. moving forward..

today/s the 12 Jan 2013
365 days.. and i'm left with 353 days..

gotta start tresuring my time from now onwards..
Was sharing this with minghui last week..
I'm already starting to count down from my mum age 85 already...
Daddy passed on at age 61.. i've already earned 6 years.. and I've been praying to God.. to let my mum lives till 85. If so, i'm only left with 18 years to be with her.. and i want to treasure every single year, month, days, minutes and second.. I must treat her well so that she's happy every single day of her life. to give her everything that she wants. that will shape everything i have on my life.
this is a defining year of my life..

1. Personal
Physically- i will slim down this year..
diet- soupy stuffs and no fried stuffs, to say no to unhealthy food, and eating in moderation. aiming 50kg end of this year..
Excerise- Zumba and 6 months of hot yoga- able to do all poses for bikram by end of the 6th month
Surgery- Doing breast reduction surgery by Oct 2013. Aiming for C cup..
Family- Spending more time with mum and bringing her out. help up with household chores. mend back ties with my sister, and get my brother and sister and all of us to be close
Sacys- to be more personal and sharing of more feelings. To be there for each other.. and to maintain friendship with those i care for..

2. Finance
1K per month...
aiming to hit 41K cash and 90K assets by my birthday.. be more thrifty and increase my savings. be more prudent.

3. Job
going to keep it simple..
Prospecting tool- seminar only.. i dun ask for referrals one, and i only depends on my clients to give me referrals which will not keep me alive.. the seminar model is easy and simple, and will continue to give me more clients that are in working field- should treasure this. have to work with Irene to expend this.
Reviews with current clients- added a new pool of clients last year.. good to go back and review and be consistent in my work.
aiming for 120K production- 10k API monthly.. that's equivalent to a monthly income of about 3k i guess.. keep it concise.. and of yah.. finish andrew tan's client list. i must achieve that..

4. Sacys.com
This is gonna be exciting.. going to start Sacys.com
gonna register the company by Jan, sourcing in Feb in TW and HK, Website designing from Mar till May, Mkting plans, Ops, finances and social media by Apr and May, Testing in May and launching by Jun.. Jun to Dec.. running and expending and letting it becoming systemize.. i must do that.. end of the year, to review and hopefully to add Sacys.com own label..


So for this year, what will i do?
Jan-
Personal
Picking up my dancing.. gonna to sign up for zumba, and arrange to go for it every weekend for the rest of this year.
I must also finalise my early CI plan too!!
finalise my trip itinery and printing and money exchanging and packing by 25.
Job
Gonna run for ipad mini and wrap up the cases, gonna do the necc calling on this sunday. 12K.. I've already have 2k. Have to look for the remaining 10K. If i can get NN, YQ and FQ cases, how about EL? that should be around another 6K more.. so gotta look for another 2 more cases. hope i can find them. finish calling andrew tan's client.
SACYS.com
it's rather dormant now.. i gotta revive it back.. before i leave - gotta register the company at least. research about clothes and the manufacturer
website-- i have to settle on what i want.. i have to make the decisions, else it will never materialize...

Feb is a month of fun i guess...
Personal
coming back on the 4th, should be helping up with CNY matters for mum, and to help with the unpacking. going to have our reunion dinner, and to prepare for the HK trip.
Continue with my Zumba
Job
Meanwhile, to settle any admin matters and cont sourcing for my 12k.
Sacys.com
mt up with webbie designers again. more research for clothes.
Flying to HK on the 26, besides having fun, going to HK, Zhuhai and Shenzhen to source for clothes and learn how to ship them back.

March
Personal
Mum's going for her knee replacement surgery one week after my HK trip, so mainly gotta stay at home and look after her.
Continue with my Zumba
Resume my hot yoga on the last day of march- aiming to go at least 4 times every week- like mon, tues, wed and thus, fri rest, sat zumba and sun rest.. something along this line.. crossing fingers!
Job
Just right, going to pick back my calling etc, for the teachers, doing reviews etc.. and my own clients too!
preparing for the seminar and con't to focus on expending and expending it..
ignore the pple, and focus on what i wana do..
Sacys.com
tie down website developer, start up with the infancy stage of the website.. going to learn how to do the photography, start ordering in the clothes, draw up my mkting plans for the webby

April
Personal
Gonna work mainly from home again, and hopefully to be able to do my yoga then... on mon, sat and sun.. Yoga first month..going back to 63-65 kg
taking care of mum
Early CI plan 90 days waiting period over.. gonna start researching for breast reduction surgery soon..
To cont with zumba as well..
Job
Doing one seminar here.. let's see if we can fill another one in here..
Sacys.com
website test pg should be up by then.. learning how to do the creative part, clothes should be in.. going to set up acc for payment gateway, and mailing? email newsletter and other social media? close the loops on things i gotta do here..

May
Personal
Yoga- 2nd month.. tonner and fitter, hovering 60-63kg
Zumba on weekend
Taking care of mum
Job
contacting teachers from previous seminar, hitting min 40K API by now..
Sacys.com
Website should be more or less done, reviewing what needs to be done, clothes? are my sources ready.. all of us wants this to succeed.. so gotta push myself forward.. Mkting plan tied down, budgeting down.. and look forward to it providing us with a second income.. and hopefully, one day, to provide surviving income for all of us, each to look after an aspect of this business.. owning our own company..
Sacys Pte Ltd.. Nice!

June
Personal
Hit 60KG again!
Yoga at 3rd month, and zumba to continue..
Hopefully mum is much more stable then..

Job
Hitting 60K API.. haha.. thou i have no idea how to hit it thou..

Sacys.com
ready to go live!

Taking stock

It's time to move on again..
finally hit my precious 30k of savings..

Let's see where I can move on..
Where do i wana head towards to?

At age 40:
My Job- FC, having 300-400 clients, preferbly mainly families.
My Business- Sacys.com, having a customer base of 50,000. Self run, with system in place. Full return on investment, and earnings is able to sponsor everyone a Europe trip yearly. and hopefully, will be able to achieve all these shoppies as well.
SacysPremium.com
SacysMen.com
SacysKids.com
and the one that I've been playing in mind for the whole day
SacysPreloved.com
it would be best if it can grow overseas.. the indonesia, malaysia, australia and down under market.
My Property- a fully paid for 3 room flat, preferbly rented out, and I am still staying with my mum to take care of her. this constitute part of my passive income. and if i feel like it, to move back in occasionally; alternatively, i just thot that, mebbe i can get a condo myself, like those EC, or otherwise, a small one or two bedder, so that mum can happily move in and enjoy her years, while i can collect rental on the hougang flat. gotta wait for me to sell off spottiswoode, in another 3 more years before we can talk about this thou. hopefully, my brother is happily married with amanda then, so that there can have their own place. and mum will be happy with moving around.
My financial investment- IFS will still continue at 400/ mth, dutifully saving up for my retirement. My GE, TM and NTUC policy will continue to accumulate as well. that's all that I have, and i'm pretty sure i wouldn't be starting any more insurance long term committment. 2 savings plan, one whole life cover and one long term investment. I also wanna to have a ifast account whereby it will have a mixture of equities, bonds and divideds fund, with the dividends being invested back to buy more funds. with that, hopefully, i can build a cash cow for my retirement as well.

there's alot of other things that i wana do, my dancing, my yoga, music composition.. but i really am too thrifty, or stingy to really persue them. when i only have a few thousands in my bank account last year, i told myself, that i will continue my yoga once i hit 15k in my bank.. I achieve 30k now, but yet, i still dun bear too.. it's a matter of bringing up, i wouldn't wana throw money into it. and i guess, i'm scared that my income will drop again..

1. MY Job as a FC

I still wana be a FC, dispensing advise.
becoming a professional advisor who does proper followup.
being knowleadge about products.
I wana get out of the office. It's becomign a terrible place to stay in. So much unhppiness with one another. i just dun wana let myslef be drag into it, now see the hipocraosy of everyone. it's tiring. And i can save money by giving up that cubicle. I need to be more thrifty.

Clients
Finish the client list by end of 2012.
Call all clients for followup, and define proper followup dates.
Call all andrew clients. I must face that fear, and get rid of this headache.
those pple will nt know that i've been procrastinating, and I need to work out how to follow up with those guys. it's my responsibility to do so.
I know that i also fear that i will have nth to follow up on once i clear this list.. but still remember what Gary taught me? I must face up to it.
What doesn't kills me will only make me stronger.

Prospecting
I want to create a new prospect list
I want to focus on the worksite project
I want to find a new way to bring client in
Remember, great minds discuss ideas, average discuss events, and poor minds gossip. disgusting.

2. Sacys.com
Sacys Pte Ltd incorporated
Bank account incorporated
website created
= pages and layout designed=
=terms and condition defined=
= contents confirmed=
suppliers sourced
= visited and see find manufacturers=
= products purchased=
Products
= models and photoshoot and photoshop=
Marketing
= how to get pple to buy=
= social media- facebook, instagram, twitter
Operation
= working out flow=

first 6 months- 300 unique individual client
first year - 600 unique individual client
by end of 2nd year- 2000 unique individual client

I can be really hardworking and put my efforts in it to grow this site. now is a matter of working with my sacys that i am not sure what to do.
I dun mind coming out with the funds to pay for all these sites. but i really dunno if things will work out or not. stay focus.
products purchased
from 30-35yrs old.
Creating and building up this label.
it's gonna be tuff, with some heavy invetment along the way. But if this becomes feasible, then I'll be able to create a second source of income for everyone.
Let us start off with Sacys.com
Sacys.com will focus on ladies apparel and accessories. The initial stage will be purchasing of clothes and accessories and listing them to sell. Marketing and letting pple know my blog. how?


3. My own place
I'm really sure that i wana save for a flat when i reach 35.. Technically, I still have about 50 months to go..
So how much do I want to have by then to pay?
assuming if it's 300K, I'm aiming for 100K, that's should be a good enoff figure for the place bah..
I'll at least clear a third of the amount, and can take up loan for it. Quickly clear the loan by age 40, so that I can have my own roof over my head then. by then, my mum would already turns 78.. I'm so scare. I really dun dare to imagine what will happen. I need to ask my mum what she intends for us to do with this place when she's no longer around.
There's no way i will live with my sister, I would prefer to either get my own place, or to buy over this house. I'm perfectly contented staying here anywhere.
I think, best case scenario, i get my own place at age 35, preferbly already built, and to rent it out while i continue to stay with mum. this will forms part of my passive income by then.

I have 14K cash and 30K cpf in spotiswoode. If i wana have 100k then, i'll be looking at 56k by end of 56 months.. that means savings of 1k monthly.. and good thing is that i just started ifast 1k monthly.. so if i can stick if it till end of 56 months, i'll be able to hit it. let's cross fingers..

For my finances.
Right now,

ST
DBS- 1K now, that's for my current day to day expenses, and I'll be crediting 1k into it monthly.
OCBC- 4K, that's for my income crediting and for all giro and other expenses.
SCB- that's for my precious emergency fund and ST savings.
4K of account receivables.
I need to be more thrifty with my spending, and keep it within the limit of 1k monthly. it's not impossible. i can achieve it.

So all income that's coming in now,
all goes to my Oc account,
1k to dbs for personal use
600 for mum
216 TM
216 GE
1k ifast
400 IFS
100 Mis
200 CPF for spottiwoode mortgage
250 CPF medisave
50 donations
200 Incoem tax
total= 4200..



so now, mid nov,
for my fc job,
finish calling all andrew clients, at least there must be a mark that i've attemped to call them. fix appt with my own clients for review. call the teachers and arrange appts to meet them. continue propecting the schools for appts. expand into other organization for prospecting. clear up my client list and my hard drive case folder.

for sacys.com
really, truely understand the pro and con for sole propreitership, partnership and pte ltd. i'm leaning toward pte ltd, and the cost, tax implication. Sacys Pte ltd will be registered by 15 Jan 2013.
source for more website design company to know the vaious packages offered, the ongoing maintaince cost, and how much of the website will really belongs to us, or to the hosting company. i must chk out on the photoshop thingy and how to create those lovely postcards banner pics. I intend to confirm the design company by end of dec, so that we have a lead up to march to complete the webby.
Meanwhile, at taiwan and hk in feb n march, we will start buying out stocks, with a budget of 1k each time, hitting 100pcs. aiming, 1 collection per week, 20 designs per collection, and let's just keep 5 on average. let's see how things go first ya. and of cos, i intend to buy 3-4 collections worth of stuffs by then.
between march till april, we would have sort out the goods into 4 collections, ready for photoshooting, and would have engage the models, secure a shooting locations, and the schedule for shoots for indoor, and outdoor if any.
By April, we will have engage models, and start photoshooting on the merchandise-. so that's one main pic, 4-6 side pics of high quality pictures, and hopefully, by then, at least 2 of us would have master the skills of photoshoping, and is able to create the banner, as well as marketing initiatives already.
During April to May, we would have make one more trip back to China/ HK/ BKK to find more supplies. We will tie down our mkting strategy, with relavant markting materials pending to be created. we would have also figure out our ops, mailing cost, overhead, and pricing.
By May- Sacys.com is launch and ready for business.

for personal
finalise my taiwan trip itineray
and of cos, my health.. come on girl.. get ur ass moving and cut down ur weight.. ur hair and skin are now perfect. of yah, and of cos, the major op coming out in june.. my breast reduction surgery.. gonna start sourcing for a doctor soon..

Increasing my knowledge on investment.. How?

I love reading.. What shd I be reading up on?
How do I get my knowledge?
Our preferred way of capital allocation
Cornerstone of our investment philosophy is to maximise the risk adjusted returns for our client,
All risk taken are intentional, and are explained to client.
Expected to be compensated with the risk taken. 
1) diversification
- are not correlated
2) minimise the influence of fear n greed
3) look at the big pic and think long term
4) we eat our own cooking
- sounds convicted

Throw them a scenarios
- if in the next 30 yrs, you see epidemics, wars, market crashes, will you invest? 
2007, I have the best bonus, STI 3,800
2009, I was working hard to save my bonus. Largest outflow.

If client wish to construct the same pf of different funds in same asset class, eg resources
If pf increase by 25%
If pf decrease by 25%
What will you do? 

3 steps in pf construction
1) Inter
2) Intra
3) Fund selection

Bonds
Focus more on income than appreciation
Equities 
Allocated base on GDP of the country

Sharing by Kenneth Goh
Do you have clients come up to u and tell u that I have put my money w u for the past 3 yrs n it's not making money?
What is one quality we must have when we sell to the client?
Enthusiasm 
how do we get enthusiasm? 
Knowledge
Instead of being the problem
do I have the solution?

When market is down, 
Do I not do anything, or I 
I have 2 plans in this climate- we can do all bonds, but we can do bonds, and get income, or we can buy it cheap. This will depends on ur risk profile, horizon and future stream of income.

Philip sharing
Gathering money
This is one of the best time if my time is abt 3-10 yrs away
Make an effort to see my client
I chg u a wrap, I will work hard for my money
I should see my client. 
It doesnt means that client lost money, they wouldnt put more.

Long term, discipline and continue to invest
Networth summary for my client
Update status and update portfolio
Have to be discipline. Have to invest when mkt is down. 
Matter is not to invest or not, but what to invest in now. 

No one is right or wrong, just concentrate on living the life that I want. 成为一个自己喜欢的人。 Every matters that happen Is a learning stone, will learn and grow from here.

All my mum's dream is to have a bad for herself... Can I fulfil It for her? Hope that one day, this can be achieved..

Watched Wicked today. It's a very good show. Always that that I'll be the type who'll not like musical, cos in my narcissistic self created world, I'm a arty farty person who enjoys such atas stuff, but the cynic in me, told myself that I wouldn't understand, let alone enjoy it.. No doubt I started getting bored at the beginng, but as the story continues, I started enjoying it, immersing myself into the storyline and the music. Climax was at Defying Gravity, while was touched by the last song, For Good.
Really, finding someone who can make you want to become a better person is so precious, be it in terms of family, friendship or a partner. Gonna really treasure all my friend, and to become a better person.
Gonna defy gravity and not give in to what life may throw to me, especially, since I'm so fortunate to be bit born green. Haha...
I've always say, Life"s a journey, a book, I'll write the ending I want for myself, Have a happie 30th year!
Gonna mark this year with some major stuff..
1) trip to Europe
2) seeking consultation to correct my oversized breast, used to have this hesitation as I've read many reports saying that it's impossible to do breast feeding after the breast augmentation, but then, I'm already 30, so believe I'll be fortunate/ unfortunate to not be bringing any life on earth, thus I wana go for this surgery to make myself happier.
3) Building back my assets, to have the savings amt that I want, after the bomb for the europe trip, so that I can resume bringing my mum overseas as and when I want to.
4) moving house, for my mum, for myself.
5) giving up on Tze Vin
6) dating- finding different pple to go out with, and finding that I can have a good time. To be more sociable, to stop Thinking that gng out, making new friends is a waste of time. I've got lotsa time to waste, in fact, I've got the rest of my life to waste.. .n I do miss the intimacy of having someone special that you have over exclusively. Hope things will fall in place..

Looking forward to 30

1) Insurance Cover:
Death: $450,000
TPD: $450,000
CI: up to $500.000
PA: $100,000

2) Financial Status
Increase Net Worth to $80,000
Reclaim all my debts
ST: $25,000
Current Account $10,000
Emergency Fund $15,000
MT: $28,000
Spotiswoode 18: $14,000
FSM: $10,000
LT: $27,000
IFS: $27,000

3) Career
8 appts per week
5 new clients per month
$20,000 API per month
Call for appts every last week of the month and do confirmation
Do up my CFP title

4) Physically
Drop to 55 kg
Go for pilates class every week
Hair every quarter
Facial every 2 months
Go for my medical examination in June

7 Ways to Motivate Yourself

Whether you're looking for a new job, trying to make your current one better, or planning a career transition, you'll need a healthy dose of motivation. Without discipline and will, your dreams and ambitions never come to life, turning even the best intentions into dust.

Here are seven ways to motivate yourself, so you can pick and choose the ones that work best for you:

Find the why. When we set out to do something, it's important to keep the why in the front of your mind. Are you looking for a new job because you dislike your boss? Need more money? Want a shorter commute? Getting where we want to go can be a long journey, so never forget what set you out on the road to begin with. Write down why you're motivated and refer to it often.

[See 10 Tips for Negotiating a Raise.]

Look forward. Pretend you have accomplished your goal. For example, if your goal is to learn a new language to impress a girl, you need to consider if the task is worth taking on--what if she rejects you? View things from multiple perspectives and ensure you are taking worthwhile roads. Once you commit, put the negative scenario out of your mind and concentrate on how good it will feel when you succeed.

Just do it. There's a reason the Nike slogan has endured for more than two decades. In the Data Age, we have so much information available to us at all times that it's easy to get lost in number-crunching oblivion. But there's nothing like rolling up your sleeves and getting started. Think about it: A perfect resume is useless if you don't send out. You'd be better served sending out 10 resumes that are almost perfect than none at all. Rarely are actions an absolute waste of time.

Reward yourself. If your goal is to get a new job, you will need to take action to make a change. Set goals and share them with someone you trust so that you can be held accountable. For example, promise that you'll send out two resumes a week to relevant jobs. If you succeed, reward yourself with a predetermined item. Likewise, if you fail, be sure to carry out a predetermined punishment. Even if a project doesn't feel as if it's worth your time, make it your business to make it worth your time. Otherwise, getting started can feel impossible.

[See How to Position Yourself to Change Careers.]

Think of someone you hate. We all know jealousy and hatred are ugly emotions, but unless you're a Buddhist monastic, they're also a reality. Why not turn something dark into a tremendous motivator? Image the person you dislike taking action while you rest on your laurels? Wouldn't you rather be showered with happiness and rewards? Push yourself to get started--today!

Give yourself choices. Negative self-talk is often a high hurdle we must clear to get ourselves pumped up to do something we dread. Remember: You don't have to, you want to. This simple thought-swap can make any task more palatable.

Break it up. What sounds easier? Writing 1,000 words in two hours or writing 125 words in 15 minutes? Breaking your task into smaller parts will help you get started.

Mid Year Review!

Very grateful that I'm born rite in the middle of the year.. thus a mid year review implies the start of another age for me again..
Come 2 more weeks, i'll be turning 29.. the last birthday where i can use only 2 big candles on the cake le.. this time round, i'm gonna have a cake with 29 candles on it! So that i'll can have 29 wishes.. one for each year until i hit 58.. hahahaa..

i still rememember when i was about to turn 18.. i was at OLP chatting with Kenny and Sun Maoting.. was asking Sun Maoting, how he feels about turning 20.. and i guess his reply was, not much feelings?
I remembered that i dreaded turning 18 then.. i felt that i was so old.. and really, in a blink of the eye.. i'm turning 29 already..
Remembered that time, went with my SACYS to Far East and purchased that Ms Sixties jeans.. and remembered i declared that each year, i'll go back to that shop and purchase a size smaller than the previosu year jean.. and unfortunately, that didn't materialize at all.

Wasted 10 years of my life i guess.. looking back, i wish i had done alot of things differently.. for eg, to not be that close up during uni so that i had more friends then, to learn to take care of my looks and become more presentable then. To enter accounting so that i can become an auditor instead. To have an idea where i wana go after graduation. To know how to manage finances much earlier in my life so that i'm rich enoff to purchase the dream condo that my mum yearn greatly.

Looking forward, i definately doesn't want to waste my next 10 years.. i really wana see myself, patting myself on my back when i turn 39 that i've led a good life. a life that i can look back and be proud of myself, a life filled with integrity and happiness.

So what's my plan then?
realised that sometimes, i'm too forward looking, i've got the goal in place, w/o any tactical strategy, which often results me getting lost after sometimes. i tend to be greedy and aspire to achieve many things at one time.. so from onwards, i'm gonna break down the goals in biteable size so that i can achieve them step by step. Just like the quote i see at Tanjong Pagar MRT station- "the trick to success is to never, ever give up". So lemme set what i wana achieve, and the actions i'll be taking to achieve them with the deadline in place to keep me in check.

My goal for this year is very simple..
1) To become prettier!
2) Family & Friends happiness
3) Systemize up my business
4) Defining who I am.. Spiritually, financially, mentally and personally

My Physical self- To become prettier!
1) I wana to sleep earlier daily. lights out by 12mn at least 4 times per week. No phone on the bed.
To wake up by 8.30am daily

2) Get a good eye cream after i finish this bioessence one.. it's not working for my eyes currently.. the dark circles, milli seeds and lines are showing already. I want to start this latest by september, so that when i look at myself at next year birthday, my eyes will not look that tired!

3) Going for Gym and a class at least one / week. Starting from the week of my birthday, to at least go for one gym session and one yoga class every week. otw i will be wasting my money.

4) complete my dose of TRA. It's gonna expire by july and august.. omg.. it's a 3 mths session? why are there still so many pills? Can I con't to take it on a daily basis with the correct dosage? i'm aiming for 58kg by my birthday.. i wana hit that very much. to give myself the best birthday pressie!

5) okay.. gonna pick back my beauty regimn again..
Hair:
Quaterly treatment at pharse - next session is gonna be in august. - Apr, Aug, Dec- budget of $200/ session.
Meanwhile i'm gonna stick with weekly conditioning, and using the beauty credit serum.

Face:
monthly Facial at Lee Wah- budget $80/session
Peppermint pore mask followed by tissue mask every other night.
Sleeping mask every 3 nites.

Eyelashes:
Eyelashes enhancing serum twice per day

Teeth:
Crest at least once per month
To remove my wisdom tooth by end of this month. that shall be my last wisdom tooth and to stop the misalign of my teeth. need to call and fix an appt by this coming week ya?

Nails:
Apply my fungus cream every day

Skin:
my weekly scrub on sunday followed by lotion
moisturizer for my feet every nite!

Inner self/health:
Collagen every sunday nite!
glocosamine every nite
To do my full body checkup in march 2012

1) Family & Friends

Mum:
1) Her Legs- she say that she wana go for the knee replacement operation. I need to bring her to the polyclinic so that she can be referred to the hospital for the checkup to see if she's suitable for this ops.
I'll bring her to the polyclinic by 15 Jun.
I'll call NTUC to chk if she's covered for this ops by 15 Jun

2) Time with her
I'll bring her out every alternate friday. anyplace she wana go. eating, massaging, shopping etc.. groupon is a good place for me to get cheap deals to bring her around

3) Moving house
guess we realy gotta move. What mum said is rite.. it's good for everyone to have a room of our own. If mum shares the new place with brother, where can sis lives when brother gets married? however, at that point of time, sis can buy over the place should brother gets married. i gotta find a place that's affordable and can accomodate all of us..
To look for a few property agents to help me look out for flats and condos at hougang, sengkang areas.
I need to also pay attention to HDB new housing launches too..

4) siblings
brother- finish financial planning for him by end of july.
sis- bring her to do hair with me, return the $80 that i owe her for her hair and talk to her.

5)Friends..
I think i'm really fortunate that there are so many pple who take me as their close friends.
I wana pick up my letter writing project again.. wau.. been procrastinating it for so so so so many years already.. omg.. i will dedicate a day per month after my CFP for all these admin things.

6)My little boy.. it's so sad that I can't even remember his name.. but i'm glad! finally finally fulfiled my dream of paying it forward to help someone change his life. but i will keep this close to my heart, and to always remember that shi bi shou gen you fu..


Career
streamline, streamline, streamline.. i kept talking about streamlining it.. but i've got no idea on how i can do so?
the vast number of pple scares me..
will i be able to complete my contact list if i spend 3 full days doing so?

1) Getting my CFP!!
Assuming that i'll pass my papers this july.. I'll finally fulfil this dream of getting my CFP before 30 years old!
So proud of myself..

2)Creating my own FNA report!
I've got so many ideas in my head, but i do not know how to put them in paper format so that it's standardise. I'll start this after the CFP paper as well.

3) Systemize my biz model!
Apparently, it's very obvious that there's no way i can work the same way as per when i just enter this industry. It's really tuff to have 8 appts daily... cos most of my appts don't fly already.
Thus, i'm resetting it already.. lemme work towards having 10 appts weekly.. that's all.. and if possible to squeeze them from monday-thursday.. so that fri-sun is for family and friends. To achieve 10k API monthly instead..

i) to go for my wisdom tooth operation on 20th
ii) taking a break from 20-24 this month
iii) Merge my contact list together so that it can sync with my iphone
iv) Create another contact list on excel spreadsheet so that i have a clear view of the plans that my client has. transfer these details from the production list
create proper follow up list for mine and andrew's client. -- I need to have an idea how many clients i actually have!
v) Start my motor insurance project
vi) Finish my testimonial handbooks - as a mkting material, quality referrals getting tools and sourcing genuine feedback from clients.
v) return back to office on 27 and to continue to contact all these groups of pple.
vi) My prospect and pending list.. I should be glad that i've got this good problem.. too any pple to call.. but for some reason, i dunno why, i just can't get started on calling them! after closing the cases on hand, i'm gonna to just focus on this group of pending list, client list and referral list.
My aim is to get 65% banding, have 4k monthly income.. that's all.. nothing too faciful cos i prefer to focus on living my life, and enjoying my job!


Defining who I am and what i wana do

i want to see a happie, cheerful, a person with integrity, honesty and fairness in her doing. A person who's focused and serious with her work, and a person who's playful and naughty with her friends. a person who's brutally honest with herself and others, and have to courage to face and overcome what scares her.
A person who's the best daughter, siblings, friends, FC, colleagues accordingly to the pple she loves. A person who makes other pple envy her mum, siblings, friends, clients and colleagues for having her in their life. A person who will makes pple cry and luff during her funeral. A person who's forward looking and has her life planned out already. A person who's financially independent by 30.

Spiritually
without doubts, and always will be. I know God loves me, and chose me to love. I strongly believe that my current position as a non chuch goer, a not 100% believer in every practices is also determine by him. I also believe that He's the one who will determine when I will change this mentality. As of now.. All i just want is to finish the one year bible plan. to start attending church.. I want to attend FCBC at least once by end of this month.. I gotta find the time! all my weekends are already full! OMG.. if all else fails, gonna go back to wesley.. i actually like the serenity there thou it's really quite oldish there.. whatever will happens, i know that my god has planned it all out for me.. and i love him for loving me so much...

Mentally
Completing my CFP! I'm so excited! and gonna make the name chop with my CFP title! who cares abt MDRT? Haa.. even if, in the event that i actually garnered 110k comm for this year, i'm not gonna apply for it anymore.

i wana continue to read more.. Not only in terms of finance, but in terms of self improvement, to learn how to become a better person. just like the Wu Dan Ru book that i just finished.. i wana become a person with more depth.

Financially
Short Term
I'm gonna stay broke for quite a while.. lent out so much $ to so many pple this year.. read this saying before- expect no return when you lend ur money out.. well, anniway, the money is worth paying to see how this person is like.. so lemme see what will comes out from this.
but with this action.. my ST savings and EF is really really low.. gotta have only one focus for my finance this year-- to build up a cash savings of $25k- $10k for ST and current usage, $15k as my emergency fund. I'm $20k away from this goal.. help!
anniway, by the end of this year.. to achieve this even if it means eating bread.. gotta go back to my thrifty days!
N i gotta set aside $4k to bring my mum for the autumn trip.. Hope i'll get back the borrowed money by then..
Oh yah.. sticking with giving up the cubicle by sept.. actually, i'm clsoe to being able to do it already.. lemme finish the client list and motor insurance project first.. den i'll definately look into it..

Mid Term
There's nothing much that i wana purchase in the next 2 years.. gonna stick with the original plan of starting a ifast of $300 monthly of my 30th birthday. this shall fund for my flat when i turns 35.
by 35, i guess i should be in the process of selling of spottiswoode 18.. so there should be a decent lump sum to pay for the flat. anniway, for this flat, if it's gonna cost me about $400,000, the downpayment with reno and furnishing should set me back by $100k.. so if i'm able to get back at least $50k from spottiswoode 18, i'll just need to have savings in cash for about $50k.. wich makes it about MT savings of $800 monthly.. still owe myself $500 monthly from 30 yrs old onwards.

Long term:
it's gonna stay status quo currently..
with only about 1/3 by 30 years old..
if i'm gonna focus on the house, i'll be stuck at this 1/3 for quite a long time.. it's not health.. so no matter what ger, by 30, do a revision and aim for more..

Matters of the heart..
Amazingly.. amazing, amazingly.. normally, any post i blog are filled with Mr Sim's memories.. but i just realised, i haven even thot about him or visualise a future with him anymore.. even for the past 2 days, any thots about him came after this guy that i only met for 3 times. I am so amazed! for the past 4 years, i always chose to stick with waiting for mr sim even if someone who fits who i think i'm looking for comes along.. cos mr sim has always been so precious to me.
but this guy, even thou i dunno him well at all, and have not display any traits that i'm attracted to normally, seems to captivate me. but of cos.. he's not interested in me and he has someone whom he has already discussed which type of housing they will be purchasing.. i guess i should be glad.. God sent someone to test how impt mr Sim is to me.. and has proven to me that Mr Sim is not as close to my heart as i think he is.. it's just that so far, no one can capture my heart like mr sim.. however, this guy managed to catch my attention and makes me yearn to know him better within 3 mtings.. hmm.. issit my own desperation at work?
nonetheless, i now know that mr sim is just a convenient person for me to justify that there's actually no guys who's attracted to me.. hahaa.. on hindsight, looking at this situation, i wish that i didn't express my feelings to him then.. at least, there wouldn't be this change in the friendship.. i wonder, will this feeling change again? i hate being a gemini.. so inconsistent with my thots!

Money Matters

AIM:
Give up cubicle by the end of this year. It's wasting money which I can use to save up for my future use.
Learn to work from home and streamline my biz system. How to streamline it? I need to think it thru!

ST Money-- $20,000
1) Current A/c: Hit 10K liquid money
All in and outflow to go thru current a/c.
2) EF A/c: Hit 10K EF
3) Start FSM once I hit my Current and EF a/c balance.

Not forgetting that I've gotta bring my mum for a holiday.. Am pondering now.. Where should I bring her to since Jap is out? China? or USA? Turkey? Italy? Taiwan? or Macau/HK?
I'm going Macau and HK in May.. gotta have some money for that trip too.

MT Money--
Well, just spent most of my MT investments on the property.. which, cross fingers, will be able to sell off in 5-8 years.
I think i'll be staying single since I only have one person in mind to spend the rest of my life with. Thus MT means having $ to purchase a flat at age 35 that I can rent out for monthly income and to eventually selling it off for capital appreciation at some time.
I dun think i wana buy a condo for residential purpose at that age too.
I'm 6 years away from 35 yrs old. Hopefully by then, to be able to sell off the condo that I'm holding now and to use that for the downpayment for the new flat.
I dun need anything much for MT currently then..
Actually all I need to do is to focus on my job and up my income.. it's really easy to up my income if I'm willing to put in some hard work.. But too comfortable to do so.. =( Otw, shouldn't be hard to earn the money to buy another condo.. All I need is about $200,000 only..Lemme think about this.. if I can streamline and establish a model and focus on some specialty.. hmm..

Current Retirement Fund Strategy

Assuming I want to have $3500 monthly from age 60 onwards and it is to last me for 25years until age 85.

FV3500 @ age 60 @3.5% inflation rate = $9,823
Assuming growth rate = inflation rate during age 60-85
Total bag of money @ age 60 = $2,946,900

1) Based on my current GSA contribution of $450 monthly, expected returns at age 51 assuming 9% pa = $504,504
Reinvest at 5% from age 51-60, expected returns at age 60= $780,000
2) Current NTUC Life and GE Life Plan, expected returns at age 60 =$230,000
Total expected returns based on my current LT plans (GSA, NTUC & GE) = $1,000,000

Shortfall = $2,946,900-$1,000,000= $1,946,000
Upcoming plans to top up the shortfall
1) $300 Monthly FSM invesmtnet from age 30. Based on rule of 72, if I invest $200 from age 30 till age 65 via FSM without stopping, expected monthly drawout of $4,800 which will subsidise the monthly income of $9,823 to $5,023.
2) With this FSM topup, i will just be $506,900 away from my retirement fund. Will relook into it after I hit the $300 monthly investment.

Counting my Blessings~

They say a person needs just these things to be truly happy in this world: someone to love, something to do, and something to hope for.

I've found the person I love, I'm back doing the career i enjoy, and I'm hoping that that the person I love will love me back and my career will take off from here..

Dunno why, after going out with Xingyan ytd nite, was so happie that I couldn't sleep for the entire nite. Primarily, i think it's cos i gotta a chance to relieve whatever I did at Vietnam and thereafter to XY and feel the the emotions that I have towards Mr Sim. =) So spent the entire nite thinking about him and all the blessings I have..

Let me count my blessings..

Someone to love....

Matter of the heart..
I'm blessed that I have found someone that I want to give my heart to. Blessed, cos whenever I'm down, for eg in the past 2 weeks while I were sick, I'll just look at the photos and i'll be filled with a warm fuzzy feeling and I'll automatically smile. Blessed, cos eventhou he doesn't like me, at the very least, I found him.

Friends
Realised I'm blessed with alot of friends. Alot of pple who care about me.
Cailing, my best friend. Someone whom we care deeply for each other despite not having much time for each other. Someone I know who will set time aside every other blue moon so that we can spend some time together. Someone who holds me close to her heart when she has so many friends and obligations demanding her attention.
Shijia, my dearest friend.. the one whom i can count on to settle everything for me. The one whom i can trust my life with. The one who owe me tons of things in her past life. Yiling and Shihui.. my other 2 SACYS.. friends who have always support me, hear me luff, see me cry.. luffed with and at me. Have to stand my emotions, have to bear with my overbearing temperment.. Pple I know who will stand by and with me even when the whole world goes against me.

Besides my SACYS.. there's my dearest Lorraine jiejie.. whom always let me 撒娇at her, whom always have me in her heart, whom always treat me as a 小妹妹。。 there's also Xingyan, someone who treats me as her close friend, someone whom always jio me out and let me feel that she enjoys my company. And my dear 38 (yup, you =)) I'm truely blessed and amazed, eventhou we spend 3 months knowing each other, and lost touch with each other for more than 10 years, we can pick up from where we parted and i know you really care for me! =) Thanks for all your encouragement for the past few weeks. I miss and love you! Minghui, thanks for being my alter ego.. we're exactly the same, our fave subjects are always ourselves and the guys in our lives.. haha.. thanks for taking me as a friend.. My primary school friend gejun, thou sometimes, 真的不是很谈的来，but I'm blessed that you've taught me much about grooming, and always having me in ur heart to treat me for meals and wantng to recommend guys and high net worth clients to me. My dear little Jan, thanks for being the first angel in my career, for referring so many clients to me, for having so much faith in me when I first started this career. Thanks for being the 妹妹that I've never have.. =) Oh yah.. and AKY and GCW.. thanks for being my best guy friends.. for always conscientiously recommending clients to me, for ur encouragement and friendship.

还有i'm so grateful to this group of colleagues I made here.. My dear Ms Tan, the person who made me open up totally and feel so at ease with. the one i can chat 天南地北 with. thanks for the wonderful friendship you've gave me.. and of cos, pple like derrick, jess, irene, sharon, coco and dom.. thanks for giving me this circle of friend.. this clique that I belongs to at work. and HL, for always telling me that I'm his role model, GS, for giving me this affirmation that I've been a good boss.. It really means alot to me.. and of cos.. Jodie.. thanks for msging me on an almost daily basis asking me how my day was.. sharing with me ur case studies etc.. althou i don't enjoy the attention, but i'm grateful that i pass thru ur thots almost on a daily basis.. of cos, my dear 老板.. eventhou i know we have different allience, i'm grateful for your effort in bringing me up in my career.. eventhou you dunno it, you'll be the person i'll ask to stand in as my father to give me away should I ever get married in a church.

I'm blessed in terms of my career. Sometimes, i'll think back, if I've stayed in banking, i should be similar to Janice, minghui and cailing bah.. earning 4k plus, 3-4 months bonus and the other std benefits, without much worrying about how to ensure my survival in the next few months.. however, just the thots of living my life day in and out doing the same things, all the way until i'm 30, 35, 40, 45 till 60..make me scared. I dunno why, i think it's scary.. we spend the bulk of our time at work.. if we dun do something we enjoy, then i think it's a huge waste of time.
I'm grateful that I've been able to survive in this career so far. And exceptionally thankful that I've got this group of clients who trust me explicitly and will seek my guidence in other matter of their lives. I'm thankful that my clients do listen to me and feels that I've helped them with their lives. I'm thankful that I've been there for them to figure out their lives better. I'm really privileged to be a part of their lives! =)

My family..eventhou i'm in a semi cold war with my mum now.. I'm grateful that she's putting in so much effort to appease me, to serve me, to look after me as thou i'm a princess. I know i'm being very bad.. but somehow as of now, i feel rather 叛逆。。 I'm grateful that after my grandma's death, i finally force my brother and sister to break the 心结 they have for so many years.. I truely yearn for the day that the 3 of us will be as close as we were when we were growing up.


Something to do

Moving forward, what's my plan?

My Career..
since I've stepped back to being a FC again, i've got all the time in the world to build back my client base. I should be grateful that I've absorbed Andrew's clients as well despite having to give him a huge cut of my income. But I will never earn this income if he doesn't gives this group of clients to me in the first place.
I want to become the legendary hardworking FC that I used to be.. Doing my fave activity calling.. Meeting up with pple, sharing my belief with them and helping them to plan for the future. Earning a good income along the way and gaining the respect of my fellow colleagues. I want to go back to having 50 appts ahead of me, 8 appts and 1 FNA per day. I want to become the FC i used to be in the past.
I want to be a FC with integrity, to call all my clients that I've neglected along the way and remind them on what they have and how far they are away from whom they want to become. i want to complete my CFP and become a real Certified Financial Planner. I want to help my clients to specialise in their retirement planning. I want to reach out to families and help them to take care of their blindspot. I want my clients to be in the know of what their portfolio is about. I want to set up a succession plan for my clients in the event of my untimely demise. I want them to be well taken care of.
I will start calling all my clients in march and fix appts to meet them in Apr, May and June. I will finish my testimonial handbook by March for them to pen their testimonial on working with me and ask them for referrals. I will have to add in meeting up with Andrew's clients and all the pple who are in my pending list.
I will start my CFP lesson in late May and take the paper in July. Hope that I will have my CFP by Sept. =)
I want to start my telemarketing project, to get telemarketeers to fix appts for me for Eldershield.
I want to do up the motor insurance phamplet for the students to distribute and to set up a unit to specialise in motor insurance.
I want to work on the Moneytree project with Ms Tan and Ms Tan to kickstart financial literacy education in schools.

My personal development..
My targeted weight.. 45KG.. by the end of the year.
I was 67 when i went to VN.. Thanks God for planning this series of events for me to go VN such that I got use to eating lesser there and become determined to slim down.
Hovering at the edge of 61-60 now.. and I really wana hit at least 55kg when I see Mr Sim in May.. then it's 50kg by aug and finally 43-45kg by end of the year..
I'm starting gym tmr and I really want to start a routine of going gym from here onwards.
I'm just went for facial today, and is going to go for it on a monthly basis to tune my skin beter. I'm still continuing with the Skin Food Peppermint Mask and am toying with the idea of going for Carbon peel to minimise my pores.. still thinking thru.. not too sure.. hmm..
My aim is that I'll look better and is thinner when I see Mr Sim in May.. So that hopefully, i can fit nearer into the type of lady he likes.. I should be going Macau in May to help him buy the fake longchamp bag for his mum too. =) Hopes he will likes it.
I'm also following the one year bible plan on iphone now.. finally getting started on knowing how to read the bible.. I wana continue with it and be able to finish reading the bible when the year ends. =)


Something to hope for..

My career plans and my physical transformation are my only focus this year.
I hope that I'll achieve whatever i've stated here when this year ends.
Most importantly, i really pray and hope that, now that Mr Sim knows that I like him, will take a look at this blog one day and realised that there's this lady here who likes him so much, and is so grateful to have known him. and hopefully, one day, he will be touched and will see this lady more than a friend.. That's my biggest wish. I know many friends have scolded me and say that i shouldn't change for a person. I also subscribed to the thinking that one should never change for another person. Mr Sim is the motivation for my change.. I'm the ultimate beneficiary of all my actions. Also, i'm facing 30 next year... for some reason, after coming back from VN, i suddenly realised that who and what I am now is the results of all my actions in the past 28 years of my life.. And therefore, my actions will determines who and what I will become from 30-60 onwards.. I want to see myself as a happy, healthy, pretty, slim, popular and successful FC and friend from 30 and beyond.. Thus, i need to set my foundation from my 29-30 period.. all that I'm doing now will set the direction of what I will do from this moment onwards.. and I'm determined to become someone who is grateful for all that God has bless me with, someone with loyalty and kindness in her heart, someone who glows and radiates happiness from within, someone who has lotsa love in her heart..someone whose heart will always belongs to Mr Sim..

My 2011

Designing my whole new life..

What should be the focus for 2011

1) Top priority
- Building back my business.
I want to update my client list.
By March 2011, to go update my current client list and update in my inbox. That should be the easiest.
I also want to start archiving my emails as well.
I will be calling my existing clients, pending followup and previous referrals and Andrew's clients to arange for appt.
To go back to working daily until I achieve a monthly income of $5,000.
Thereafter, from there onwards, i'll be looking at 4 days week, depending on which day to accompany mum.

My aim is to hit 300 clients first.. let me hit this 300 clients and we'll talk about the rest thereafter. In order to hit my 300 clients, first, i need to have an idea of how many clients do i have. I shall go back to SG to do this. I'll do it in SG if i'm too bored here at HCMC.

My CFP.. Lemme take it during the second sem.. the Oct batch.. so that I have time to study them.

Other than the 2 above.. which are priorities, i think the rest will be focused more on grooming myself.

I want to slim down!
I've been saying this for the past 10 plus year.. but i failed in the self discipline part..
Can i do it? for current self, for my future self?
Can i stick with the TRA system for 3 months w/o giving up?
Can i do it just like Jessica, just take it as BFC?
Can I please slim down? Just to 50 KG is fine.. i'll be veri veri veri happie already.
I need to eat healthier.. Less rice, more veggie and fruits. I also want to cut down on my meat intake, and drink more water.
aim to consume only half of whatever is serve to me.
consume less fried and fattenin stuffs.


i want to drink more collagen
I will drink collagen daily to boost my skin and the stuffs within my body.
I wana try the GNC collagen that Gejun recommended. $90 for those few bottles.. will it be worth it? Can i like drink it at the beginning of each month? for 8 days straight? what will happen to me if i do that?
Can I try? Should I proceed to do facial? or shall i retain what I have on my face?
Can I promise myself to give myself a more decent person when i hit the big 30?

I will start putting on makeup daily
I need to look more presentable.. and I do need to use up those makeup in the boxes. Can i just throw most of them away instead?
What's my daily essential?
1) BB Cream from Maybeline
2) Clip my eye lashes
3) Some eyeshadow
4) My eyeliner occasionally


I want to do sth to my eyelines and dark circle!
Putting on an eye cream daily


I want to build back my assets
I need to understand the difference between liabilities and assests. Learn how to save and pay others thereafter.
I want to build back my insurance portfolio
I want to know more about real estate investment
I want to continue to save for my insurance, IFS and iFast
I want to build back my assets to before i purchase this apartment

15 years..

My life changed today.. from 3.30pm onwards..
amazingly, it will be changed today again.. time to relook and replan..

Another Year

today is the 2nd day of CNY.. 2009.. one yr has passed again.. on hindsight, quite a number of life changing events took place.

i went for a double eyelid ops on 28 dec 07.. and spent one wk at home wondering what i'll do with my life after UBS.. about a wk later, received a call from Bee bee that she helped me gotten a post with Mona at the FX team. Thot i'll give corporate life another try and went for it. At there, I was treated like dirt and w/o respect, daily keying in those date entry things were the highlight of my life. No wonder everyone treated me like dirt.. not even comparable to the blangadeshis there.. And thankfully, it was over there that i decided corporate life is not for me. I'm not ambitious enough to want to climb the corporate ladder, nor am i'm interested in buttering up the AD and D so that they can remember me and give me the projs to do etc. Seeing Mona, with 2 daughters and working from 8-9 daily, Jocelyn, working for 10yrs + at UBS, knowing everything and having everyone to her and asking her to HELP them do things just cos they're not as experience as her and not willing to learn, made me realised that no matter what, if I chose to conitnue in the corporate world, i'll end up in either of these 3 situations at 40+.
1) if I chose to kiss asses and butter pple, work damn hard w/o a life, fight for projects so that the pple up there will know who i am, i'll end up like Mona, earning 10k+ monthly, heading a departement with tons of responsibility that I'll never have time for myself and family. 2) If I chose to work hard, but remain low profile, doing what I'm told and being helpful along the way, I'll become Jocelyn, the person whom everyone turns to when they need help. Daily, I'll come in and chk my emails, solve all the problems everyone else is facing, and whenever I've got the time, to do my own duties, otherwise, I'll be da baoing my food and quickly finish my lunch so that I can do my own work while the rest of the world takes their 2 hours lunch, so that once they're back, I can continue saving their world. And finally when they end their day, I'll be chking what they do, trying hard to finish my leftover work. And lastly, 3) I'll end up like Alvin, doing what is expected of me, repeatly, day in and out for the past 20 yrs of my life, such that the plant I planted when I first came into the organisation has blossom into a tree. Arrowing people others to work so that I need not life a finger. When one of my colleagues did something wrong, I'll be the first to print out the mistake, run to Mona and tell her to confront the colleague that something was done wrongly so that I'll look good and the other will look bad.. besides the work that will determine my apprasial report, there's no way i'll help to do and teach. Haha.. but end up, heard he was retrenched some months after I left.
Looking at all these options, just feel that corporate life is not for me. No matter how good i'll appear in front of others, just by telling them that I work in UBS, I know that I'm just procrastinating the problems. No matter which catagory i'll fall under at 40, i desire none of it. That's why, when the ultimate temptation came along when Wei Wei offered me the perm post after knowing that I tendered, I still decided to go finexis.
Remembered a few days before CNY, Greg came to suntec and collected some forms from me. still remembered he mentioned that he went for a number of lo hei already, and i was thinking, yea, that's the life for me.. haha..
finally at March, I left UBS and started a new career path.
I joined BFC on April's Fool, before getting my license. That time, there was only Joel and Larel. Both of them didn't set the perfect eg for me to work. Fortunately, being ignorant, i persisted on.
Remembered the first few FF I did, esp the one which I came back to office and cried. But thank God that I somehow I just know that that was just a pharse and I'll be able to overcome it after i finally break down that wall standing in front of me. At the same time, meeting with Ting Ting made me decided to start attending church. I always know that I will go to church one day. The only thing is, I didn't know when it'll be and who will be the one who'll bring me there. And I thank God that he planned everything for me to walk forward, and lifted me thru, and walked with me to pass the most difficult period of my career.
Remembered when I first decided to join the industry, told myself and mum that I'll try until end of the year, if I can't, if i can't get a decent income, i'll leave and go back to banking. And while looking back at last year during year end, i realised that, hey.. the thot of leaving this industry has not crossed my mind at all. Hahaa.. Initially when I first started, I dread going to the office. I was so scared, scared to do calling, scared to meet pple. scared of so many things. One day, just decided to take away my fear and to aim for a working day daily. and things just turn. From going home daily to face mum asking me when I'll quit to going home and mum asking me how much have I earned today.. the feeling is wonderful. From April, no sales, to May, a few sales, to June, hittin 20K ApI, July went Aussie, Aug 43k API and finally being driven crazy by them to hit 19k API in Sept to grad, I became the first BFCer to GRADUATE and not pass out eversince the mgt adjusted the graduation criteria to 20K. the sad thing is that I didn't managed to grad within 3 mths, and instead took 5 months. And eversince then, Kerlyn had overtaken me and became the first to grad within 3 months. Hiaz.. but then again, I still set the stds for the newbies, and proved to all the pple that what the mgt said is true. It's possible to graduate from BFC. Haha.. and now, all the newbies all view me as a Sheng like that... I'm so happie. Eventhough now, I've slowed down significantly so that I can spend more time with the newbies to motivate and teach them, I'm enjoying it. I guess, it's sth that I love to do. I guess, everyone who's in this industry, or at least at finexis, like the feel good factor of teaching others, of giving, and that's why we're all in here. Of ya, and one more thing. It's thru this career, that I see the good and bad of pple, pple I know, pple I'm close with, and pple I dunno. And I see my the image I've gave them, and their perception of me, and of cos, it reviewed alot of perception that I have of some too. Alot of happiness, alot of disappointment came along my way too. But bottomline is, I guess, I've grew.
And I made so many new friends there. Pple whom has the same vision as me, long term thinkers, pple who dun give themselves excuse when failed. Clever pple. Strategist. Actors. Pple who worked hard, pple who really wana make a difference in others.. many many pple. and the fact that JY approached me the first to find pple to form the committee tells me a lot about how the mgt thinks of me. I am grateful. And I hope that I'll be with finexis for the long haul, becoming a trainer one day. I'll ask to be a BDE or BDM when I hit my 200 clients, and a trainer after hitting 300 clients. Thereafter, my focus will just be on servicing ya? That's the promise I give to myself.

Another significant event would be of cos my new eyes.. Haha.. love my new eyes, sad thing is that they're not quite symmertrical. but it's okay. I think my confidence level has increased sharply. And haha.. i guess, i become more attractive? At least, it prompted CJ to treat me extremely well for the past few months. Haha.. Has it caused Mr Sim to see me in another light? I've got no idea..

Of cos, there's the Aussie trip. The best trip i ever had, despite it burning a huge hole in my wallet. the fun, the laughter, the joy, with all the worries leaving me. That was good. Sadly too, had to face reality when we came back. Hiaz..
And finally, Mr Sim. my Mr Sim infatuation index went to it's max when he was about to leave. The farewell outing prior to the final farewell outing had left me confused. Is there more to bring friends between the both of us? I've always like him, knowin that it's not vice versa. But sometimes, always have a feeling that there can be more. Many things left unexplained, and the 11.07pm call he made to me before he left. I wondered what he wanted to tell me. At the same time, I wondered how God wana me to read this plan he made for me. But at the very least, besides MH, I finally told Darren how I felt about Mr Sim too..eventhou Darren didn't help me, at least, I think, it's still a step forward. And that day, him asking me to go NY to find him. mebbe he tells everyone that bah. I dunno..

Looking forward, for my 2009.. somehow innately, i just know that the first half of the yr, I'll be just a medicore while after having a huge row with someone who has some expectations of me, I'll work hard and triumph. I'm just wondering now.. who's the person i'll have a row with. Always thot it should be Greg since he's my imm boss, but now, am wondering if it'll be Garry, JY, CJ or Derrick. Since I work most closely with them. we shall know in May, or June.. Haha..

Careerwise
Aiming for 70% of MDRT by June, that means, have to work my ass off again. And I'll still be going to either Jap or Korea in March/April period.. haha.. I wonder.. Anniway, it's MDRT by end of this year. I wonder if i'll be able to achieve it.
I will.
Aiming to double my clientale base too. Aiming for 150 clients. Need to focus on servicing too.. Need to clear my datebase and clientale list so that I can send BD cards and pressie to them. Need to rotate having lunch with them as well. Need to set up a system for that. Have to work hard enoff to form a motivation for the rest to follow. That's my biggest motivation.
Guess I've achieved 70 clients already, I think. Need to work harder.

Family wise
Bringing my mum to Cherry Blossoms viewing. Korea or Japan, it's up to her. no matter what. She's facing alot of difficulties walking already. I must bring here to watch before her conditions worsens. Hoep she chose Korea cos currently, I'm quite broke, and secondly, it's always my dream to sponsor the entire family to japan to view Cherry blossoms. So hopefully, after this year, I'll accumulate enoff ST savings to fund this trip.
And of cos, since now i'm on neutral terms with both my sis and bro, i do hope that I can help them to bring them to speaking terms with each other. By the end of this year. Hope that there will be no quarrels between the both of them for the coming year.
Most importantly, sure hope that my sis and her current bf will stabalise, ROM by this year.. Hahaa..Then it's a load of my mind, and mum will be happie.

Myself
Love? I wonder. Sometimes I seriously think that I'll be alone for this lifetime. I'm superly underconfidence in BGR. I always wonder, how will Mr Sim think of my family? With his cynical and rich upper class thinking, how can he accept my family? My mum always have such high expectations of my sis's bf. Always want them to buy alot of things for her to give her face. There's no way Mr Sim will do that perpetually lor. And since it's me who likes him, there's no way things will work out. I guess. But sometimes, I keep asking myself, if I never try, I'll never know. Other pple? Haha.. Recently Cj flirted stongly with me. Thanks to him, my confidence grew by abit. Eventhou thou most pple, including me, would find CJ attrative in terms of look, a soon to be married man, plus an unloyal partner, is NOT attractive to me at all. So I wun get emboiled in anything heart wrenching at all.. Haha...I'm always attracted to Brainy pple.. hope one day, someone like Mr Sim but with more humble background will comes along my way. Of cos.. if I really achieve my goals.. reach MDRT earlier.. hehee.. i shall be flying to NY and spend time with him.. if i'm there.. haha.. guess shall be telling him my feel for him..
My Body.. health.. have been feeling some random heart tighnes for the past coupa of months. Need to go for a medical checkup. a full type. Shall do so once my latest policy incepts.
I NEED TO LOST WEIGHT SERIOUSLY. My wt have blossoms to 65KG!?!?!? OMG!??! but why is it in terms of physical look, there's not much change at all?!?!? ARGH!! Anniway, since i decided not to sign up for the gym package luckily, need to find someway to incorporate exercise into my life. and to cut down on my eating. hiaz.. need to monitor my wt regularly. I also wana pick up my YOGA and DANCING back. ARGH.. have to settle these when I get my engine on track for my career. Aiming for second half of the yr.
Looks. Thankfully my acne problems have more or less die down due to natural aging process. Need to focus on lifting the soon to be sagging skin and growing my hair=) wana experience Chang Fa Pi Jian the feeling.. hahaa..
Intellectually
Pick up my books to study for the ChFC.. that's my dream.. getting a pro cert.. Hahaa..

Hope my appriasal for myself next year will see me achieveing all these stuffs.. haa..